A Fish Story

Well it's been raining for two days.  I have been made to stay inside until this evening when I insisted on going out.  I had no sooner left the house than a terrible storm came.  I went to my secret hideout to wait out the storm and spend the night.  I can only take so much of those other two felines in the house!

 

I have found out that the pizza place has fish on Friday and Saturday.  Everyone knows that the catfish was a gift from the great Sun God Isis to the Cat God, Me.  That's why it's called a catfish.  I like my catfish whole, and that Mr. Lambert who cooks the fish down there at Avinger Pizza serves them whole, filleted, and in steak form.  I plan on visiting the pizza place tomorrow to see if I can get a fish handout.  Or maybe my keepers will go down there to eat and bring me one!

 

I have never had a fresh catfish.  Maybe one day Tommy Walker will catch one and bring it to me and I can eat a raw, fresh fish.  I've heard stories about them from other cats who say they are delicious!  That black devil, Lucifer, is so spoiled he won't eat anything but salmon.  That's not what wise, ancient cats eat. 

A Busy Weekend

This weekend was very busy.  One of my keepers had something called a "graduation".  I don't know what that is, but there were a lot of strange people in our house.  My keeper has a squirt bottle of water, and I hate it.  Every time I try to respond to Cliocatra's hisses by advancing on her, I get squirted with water.  It's awful.  I have decided to just let her hiss and not respond.

It's getting warmer outside and I stayed out all night a couple of nights this week.  Being a cat god, there are certain rituals I have to do at night, so when it's pretty I stay out.  Plus I don't have to put up with those uppity other cats.

A bee stung me on my butt day before yesterday.  I was minding my own business out on the porch.  I jumped clear across the porch when it hit me.  My keeper let me come inside and I took a long nap then I felt a lot better.  It's hard being a cat god.

There's a whitehaired lady across the street named Ann, and she pets me when I see her.  She's very nice to Lucifer (the black devil who is the Alpha in the house), Groucho (Cliocatra to me), and me.  I wasn't sure she would like me but she does.  I haven't told her I'm a cat god yet, I'm waiting to get to know her better.

Another lady named Jane comes over and she pets us all.  She's very nice to me, except she laughs cause I like to prop my back feet up on the wall when I sleep.  Cat gods sleep on their backs and I'm no exception.  When I prop my feet up on the wall or chair, then I dream of my time as the companion of the great Amenhotep and I am once again the god Bobby Hotep, King of all Cats.  That's a good dream!